From Mourning to Morning: Dealing with Grief and Loss

By Dr. Eric Scalise

What a difficult and painful weekend for our country, for those who live in Texas, and especially for the dozens of families who have lost loved ones in the catastrophic flooding that took place along the Guadalupe River. In times such as this, it’s hard to wrap our minds, hearts, and spirits around the tragedy … trying to make sense out of everything and put the pieces together for lives that now feel utterly shattered.

The heart cries out like the psalmist: “Be merciful to me, Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and body with grief. My life is consumed by anguish and my years by groaning; my strength fails because of my affliction, and my bones grow weak” (Psalm 31:9–10).

What Is Grief?

In these moments of tragedy and loss, grief rises to the surface – and that's normal. We feel grief whenever there is a loss of a relationship or some other object of our affection. Even if we aren’t personally connected to those lost in the floods, our hearts ache with compassion for our neighbors we see going through such unimaginable loss. We see their pain, and it touches something deep within us.

Grieving is the activity of facing the pain of loss, however close or far it may be from our own lives. It’s a response that can carry sorrow, anger, loneliness, depression, and even physical symptoms. And walking through it – not just out of it – takes enormous courage. The process isn’t about quickly escaping the pain – it’s about staying present in it long enough for God to begin His healing work.

Wrestling with God in the Darkness

As we sit with our grief, the questions naturally come. The pain can feel crushing. Sleep becomes fitful. Questions constantly intrude into our waking hours. There are rarely easy answers to events that seem so tragic and sudden.

These are “Gethsemane moments” where we may feel alone, wrestling with God and pleading with Him, “Lord, please not this!” The most human of all questions is simply, “Why?” Why me? Why us? Why now?

Unfortunately, we don’t always find satisfying answers – at least not right away – that offer any immediate measure of relief. But we’re not alone in asking them. Jesus Himself cried out in agony on the cross, pleading with His Father to answer a “why” question, only to be met with apparent silence in return. Scripture describes our Savior as “a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief” (Isaiah 53:3 NLT).

A Savior Who Understands

And here’s where our hope begins to grow: Jesus knows our pain. He knows our grief. He walks with us through it and gives us grace in our time of need.

The Bible says, “We do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need” (Hebrews 4:15–16).

Jesus understands our sorrow. In our grief, He is near.

The Fear That Follows Loss

Still, even with this assurance, grief has a way of stirring up fear.

While grief, loss, and suffering are universal, how we each face them is personal and unique. In his book, The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis commented that, “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pain. It is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

The dark night of the soul can be overwhelming and consume our will to endure the emotional storm. In that lonely place, fear can gain a foothold in our lives – fear of what lies ahead, fear of how life might change, or simply fear of the unknown.

In our fear, we may feel tempted to isolate ourselves in self-protection, to withdraw from life altogether, to live in a form of emotional exile, never being able to experience the potential joy – and healing – God has for us.

The Healing Power of Love and Community

But the very thing that feels most vulnerable in grief is also what makes us most human: love.

This is the paradox of grief: We grieve because we love. And the fact remains that sometimes, love hurts.

But love also heals. In our grief and pain, God’s love comes to us through His Spirit, through His Word, and through His people.

We’re not meant to walk through our grief alone. God has ordained His body, the Church, to be a healing community, for those whose burdens are too much to bear alone.

Together, we can shoulder the burden. We can pray with and for one another, offer tangible help where needed, and sometimes just sit beside a grieving friend in silence. These moments may not fix the pain, but they speak powerfully of God's presence. As we do this, we see the pieces of a broken world slowly knit back together again into a tapestry that proclaims God’s restorative compassion and care.

From Night to Morning

Many of us have our own testimony of God’s faithfulness … of bringing beauty from the ashes, of resurrecting life out of tragedy and heartbreak.

Our prayer for those grieving is that the Lord will meet you in your grief and comfort you with His presence. The psalmist reminds us that, “weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning” (Psalm 30:5). 

He is the God who meets us in the night – and leads us toward the hope of a new morning. May His promise be a comfort to you today … “I will turn their mourning into joy and will comfort them and give them joy for their sorrow” (Jeremiah 31:13).

For helpful resources on grief, see below:

Hope Talks podcast episode on Grief

Blog – How Jesus Helps Us in Our Grief

Blog – Where Is God in Our Grief?

Books, Video Courses, and more on Grief